Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Dating Me Requires Time

I was laughing about this subject this morning but I am like a toy with batteries not included. Except it isn't batteries but time that is required. I am not perfect by a long shot and I continue to look for someone like me, but what I realized is that I take getting used to. I am genuine and honest and to the point, sometimes overly blunt. I am super loyal and I have most of life in order. I am older than I am physically because of the experiences I have been through and at times that makes me not attracted to individuals who can't grasp or don't understand how the world works. I have had life-and-death experiences. I have seen the hand of God in my life. I am firm in my beliefs although at times I struggle to live them every day, I never stop continuing to strive to be better. I am very self-aware and with that aware of the people around me. It is both a blessing and a curse but that topic is for another time. I am educated, cultured, well traveled, and overall a pretty decent guy and not too hard on the eyes. I prefer not to talk about myself this way because I feel that it builds an unnecessary ego and half the time I don't believe that it is all true. My parents have always told me that I am a great guy and that any woman would be lucky to have me. Well, I can't seem to find "any woman" and it can become hard. Recently though, my parents aren't the only ones that have told me this. I was spending time with a woman that I was trying to date and she said the same thing... "Why are you not married yet?" And one guy that used to hate my guts said the same thing. If all of these people can see it, am I just barking up the wrong tree? Why am I attracted to all these women that can't see me as anything more than a friend? Why do I want what I can't have? Is it wrong to not want to have to convince someone that you are worth their time but that they would want to spend time with you because they want to and as much as you want to spend time with them? I think one of the problems that I have is that I am attracted to people who are too much like myself. There strengths are my strengths and their weaknesses are my weaknesses. When you date someone like that you struggle because when one of you are in trouble, you typically both are. So I guess what I am trying to say in this post is that sometimes I feel that I am not what people are looking for. If I am, they certainly can't figure it out right away. I take too much effort. Or probably more likely, I am attracted to the wrong kind of people. Well, here's for hoping that things will become more clear in the future and that my prayers are being heard for my friends and family that are going through hard things right now... Prayers and patience. It always feels like things cost more and more time.

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