Sunday, April 4, 2010

Lack of Sleep

This is just one of those nights. You know the ones. The ones where you just can't seem to fall asleep no matter what you do because you just have so many thoughts in your head. It always seems to happen this time of year too. I think it is because of General Conference. The conference happens annually and semiannually, once in the beginning of April and then again in October. It is the time when the prophets and apostles come and help the world through the inspiration and guidance that they have received from God. For me it is a time to really reassess how I am doing and what I can do in the future to become better. Kind of like New Year's for most people. But in the end, I just find myself awake at night taking the time to go for a walk and just think things over.

It is funny because I don't know if I really am too much of a deep thinker as much as I am an observer. I notice a lot things in people and in the world around me. But there really isn't a lot of people out at night. It is quiet because of that; the world is sleeping all around me. The silence is beautiful. The night has the lights of the city, as I stroll through this urban forest. The river of water flows past me rolling down into the grates. My feet crunch the newly fallen snow. It is more of a dusting than anything else but it is beautiful. The small layer of white, with the lights of the city illuminating everything, reflecting off all the wet surfaces and off the clouds above. It is as almost every sound and light have become one, just as the dark and the light, the day and the night, it is peaceful but very much alive. It is funny really, if I was asleep I would miss out on all of this. It really is suprising all the things God blesses you with when you finally realize how grateful you are. Sometimes I really love having that terrible condition of having a lack of sleep.